TEMPTATION AND DELIVERANCE
Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
“Maurice, I have to meet with Shane Simba,” rumbled the voice of Charlotte Elephanti through my office phone. “He has been a good leader for Kenya but his personal life is in the toilet. Herd animals are getting disturbed by this. Set up an appointment for me now, Maurice.”
“C-Charlotte,” I stammered. “He is very busy getting the new session of Parliament together. You know it is our first meeting since the riots. He is in no mood to hear about his personal life.”
“If he were Ralph, he would mind his manners and listen to me. I am the voice of the Mara.”
“He is not Ralph, Charl. He respects you but Shane Simba is not good old cuddly Ralph Lyon,” I warned. “He doesn’t like to be toyed with.”
“Maurice, I want an appointment with him as soon as possible,” grumbled the elephant matriarch.
“I will see what I can do and get back to you,” I said, wiping perspiration from my forehead.
It there are two mammals not to be taken lightly in the Masai Mara, it was the lion president and elephant matron.
Charlotte Elephanti feels free to castigate Shane Simba...
However, someone else was to read the president the riot act in regard to his personal life - one very close to the throne. It happened at dinner in the mansion. Staci Simba Lyon was there as well as sons, Solly, Tarek and Jalil. Also in attendance was the dark eyed human model Shane had been having a sexual dalliance with. Solly cast sullen eyes at the bosomy woman as she took a helping from the salad bowl.
“Dad, you’re a dick,” announced Solly Simba.
It rent the air like a clap of thunder. This was Solomon Simba, his favorite son…the serious lad who held such promise. Staci was the first to yelp at the assault on her beloved father. Shane was still in semi-shock.
“How dare you, Solly? Don’t you dare attack Daddy like that,” growled Staci.
Solly rose from his chair and threw the linen embossed napkin on his plate. He pointed a paw at the cringing model.
“What’s she doing here? Alex was good to you and all of us. Mom didn’t really do anything either. You just shit on all the females who love you,” snarled Solly.
That said, he left the dining room. He exited the mansion, driving his car through the security gates and headed for Leoparde Drive and the home of his beloved ex-stepfather, Jack Tarzan.
Solly Simba speaks up......
retiring rector, Saul Serval, who still plans to play a church role...
There was much ado when the sixth Cheetah offspring returned to the Masai Mara and took the pulpit from retiring minister the Reverend Saul Serval of the First Church of the Ascending Predator. We all knew that Cynthia and Dorian Cheetah had borne six offspring in one litter. There was the late Catherine who had married Shane Simba and met an untimely death in an auto crash; Cassandra who was happily married to Sefu Simba the Chief Magistrate and living in Nairobi; Christine who headed the arts center and was wed currently to Micah Mbube the actor; Caroline who was divorced from Sloane Simba having already borne Shane an illegitimate son and then there was Curtis, a lawyer with Lyon Law Firm. Now the last Cheetah offspring was coming home sporting a divinity degree from England. In this week’s church bulletin, there was a request to attend a reception introducing the Reverend Calvin Cheetah. Another party was held at his parent’s home in Mombasa. Lachlan and I were invited to that.
The wind was whipping around their sails when President Shane Simba set out with his press secretary, Cutty Sark, skimming the Indian Ocean that blustery day. The two were windsurfing, both being very expert at this particular aquatic sport. They had met at Shane’s home on Lamu Island. Before sailing, his sister, Tookie Simba, and Cutty had enjoyed brunch with the President. Shane seemed to be alone this weekend except for his usual staff. The twosome sailed for several hours before coming ashore to enjoy drinks at Shane’s luxurious home on the island.
Cutty and Shane in Lamu on the beach Tookie Simba with new friend Cutty at Shane's place in Lamu...
“Where’s that model, Shane?” asked Tookie in her usual no nonsense fashion.
“I don’t know, Tookie. I don’t keep tabs on her,” answered Shane accepting another Bloody Mary from the houseboy.
“Does she have a name?” asked Cutty with a grin.
“Um hum, it’s Cara.”
“Spanish?” inquired Cutty.
“I don’t really know her origins, Cutty. I merely bang her,” answered Shane, lighting a cigarette.
“Shane does quite a lot of indiscriminate boning as you probably have learned by now being his press secretary,” said Tookie.
“I know, I have to clean up the traces with the media,” giggled Cutty accepting a light from Shane.
“Since I am so isolated this weekend, do you two want to sleep here?” asked Shane.
“Why not, we’ll be too drunk to drive home,” agreed Tookie.
Cutty didn’t object and the threesome sat drinking and chatting as the sun began its descent over the wind capped ocean.
Lachlan chats with Luke Leoparde in the bar of TSAVO
Lachlan simply can’t believe the success of his new restaurant TSAVO. Reservations are turned down every evening due to the crowds of diners. The place is thronged each night with those standing around waiting for cancelled reservations. I insisted that Bertram Baboon and I lunch at least once in TSAVO since Lachlan is seriously considering only doing the evening dinner crowd. Bertram was late this time, hustling over to the table led by a Kikuyu waiter. I was already seated and had our martinis before us. There was also a tray of crudités of a varied nature with a dip concocted by Lachlan himself. Bertram, who seldom likes to seem impressed, was. He snapped on a ripe red radish and pronounced it as fresh as a new day’s dew. He can be theatrical at times – but then he’s a film director.
“This is impressive fare, Maurice. I must ask you personal question though. Doesn’t Lachlan smell like food when he comes home?”
“No, Bertram, he does NOT smell like food. He is neither the chef nor the sous chef. He directs the menus, creates the dishes and still works at his job as director of the mental health center,” I said, rather offended at this bit of cheekiness.
“Oh dear me, I fear I’ve hit a nerve. It’s just that I wouldn’t want my lover coming home reeking of onions or garlic,” he said, dipping a piece of celery in sauce and chewing it loudly.
“It’s not your problem at any rate,” I snapped. “How are things at the studio?”
I shouldn’t have inquired.
Leah (Simba) and Jack Tarzan bring their cubs home....
In the middle of a storm filled night, Leah Simba Tarzan experienced her first labor pains. A nervous Jack Tarzan hastened his wife to the Tigeres-Lyon Clinic. There she gave birth to two male cubs. The couple was delighted. Jack was so beside himself with happiness he rang Lachlan and me in the middle of the night to give us the good news. When he had seen Leah off to sleep still groggy from the pain medication, he drove home and saw that Betty Chimpo’s light was on in her library. He rang the doorbell and gave her the news. She was delighted for her ex-husband. They sat by the dying embers in her fireplace and drank a toast to Jack and Leah’s newborns.
The light was dim in the main living room in Shane’s home on Lamu Island. He was sitting on a chair with his legs propped on an ottoman when Cutty tiptoed to the kitchen to get a bottle of mineral water. It was past midnight and Shane gazed into a warming fire in the grate. He turned his head when she attempted to slip past him, bottle of Evian in hand.
“Come join me, Cutty. Tookie left me an hour ago. I can’t seem to sleep,” said Shane.
She sat gingerly on a chair very aware of her robe being her only garment. She pulled it tightly across her bosom.
“Want a Scotch?” he asked.
“No, I’ll stick to my Evian. I’ve had a good bit to drink today….don’t want to wake up with a hangover and miss sailing tomorrow.”
She was nervous and very aware of his muscular body still clad in his bathing suit. He was hunky as hell and she averted her eyes.
“We’ll take one of my sailboats and go to another island tomorrow. There’s one nearby that’s quite beautiful,” he said.
“How many boats do you own?”
She really didn’t care but asked to cover the fact that looking at his magnificent body, she was growing increasingly warm.
“Five of my own and the big one owned by Kenya,” he stated.
He stood to stoke the fire and she caught the scent of male mixed with salt water and sea air radiating from him. She stood abruptly.
“Tired?” he asked.
“Y-yes, yeah, I am. Damn…”
“What is it?” he chuckled, knowing damn well the effect he had on all females.
“You’re one hot male which you damn well know. What am I saying? I’ve lost my ever loving mind,” she said, placing a hand on her reddened and burning face.
“You must be tired,” he said, leaving her free to go to her room.
“Goodnight,” he called out as she almost ran to the guest bedroom and slammed the door, locking it.
Why the hell am I locking this door? Is it to keep me in or him out? She sighed and pulled down the bedcovers, slipping between linen sheets and silk comforter.
New rector, Calvin Cheetah, holds Jaguar Tarzan for baptismal....
The First Church of the Ascending Predator was filled with the scent of ginger lilies and A-list animals. It was the baptismal of Jack and Leah (Simba) Tarzan’s cubs. Shane and Alexandra Simba arrived together in the official Rolls. A glowing Leah and proud Jack held the two infant males as they were sprinkled with Holy water by the Reverends Saul Serval and Calvin Cheetah. Jaguar and Simba Tarzan mewed as the ministers held them and performed the baptismal. The surprise was the choice for godmother and godfather. Betty Chimpo and Ashley Lyon stood with group–both ex-mates of the new parents. Cars lined Leoparde Drive as the invited guests arrived after the service to join the elated parents at Leah and Jack’s home. It was a beauteous day as the guests matriculated in the garden, terrace and lawn of the home Ashley Lyon had given Leah in their divorce.
Alexandra and Shane Simba at the after party for Jack and Leah's cubs....
It was a lovely day with birds twittering overhead and the shrubs that Lachlan had so carefully planted and nurtured blooming in great profusion. We were home as it was Saturday morning. Both were resting after a spell of gardening. Lachlan’s brother, Rory opened our garden gate and joined us.
“Got any plants to spare?” asked Rory, accepting a Bloody Mary.
“You want some for your balcony and terrace?” asked Lachlan. “I’ve got a shit load of geraniums in the greenhouse.”
“I didn’t know you had a green thumb too,” I teased.
“It runs in the family….at least our mom loves her pots of flowers and herbs. She putters all the time,” said Rory.
He is the proud owner of a condo in the older section of the Watering Hole group. He just closed the deal with my good friend, Jerrilyn Jackal Scar at Jackal-Cougar Realty. We were also joined by Betty Chimpo, Gloria Chimpo Baboon and of course, Bertram Baboon. We failed to garden the rest of the afternoon but had a very satisfactory party.